Remember that one trend where people slid down banisters and handrails on trays? That was weird. People do really weird things when they’re trying to be mad internet famous.
I used to have a Me-Straw channel back when I was a teenager, and I cycled through a different trend every other month in a desperate bid to ride the coat-tails of viral fame. Didn’t work.
I remember filming a video every day for a month where I lip-synched to classic 80s songs. A little piece of me dies just thinking about it. Then there was that weird one where I decided that I’d be the internet’s first mechanic reviewer. I’d genuinely go out with my camcorder to, say, a mechanic shop in Bentleigh and evaluate them from afar, because I was a nerdy coward and actually going into the shop and talking to people was too big an ask. The weird thing was that I didn’t even own a car…I just reviewed them based upon what I could hear and see.
Gosh, they’re awful. Just a whole bunch of videos with me standing there on the other side of the street, holding the camera at my face, wind drowning out half of what I say. I try to make it sound like I know what I’m talking about with lines like “okay, there you can hear the car lift-a-tron 3000, which is now used in most garages…” or “I’m guessing that the overalls are a cotton blend, which I personally wouldn’t recommend due to the dangers of being snagged on the machinery”.
Fortunately, no business for a Bentleigh mechanic shop was harmed in the making of these videos, because the most views any of them ever got was something like…3. I think I also erred on the side of being complimentary, because as I’ve mentioned, I was a coward who couldn’t give a bad review out of fear of reprisal.
So most of my reviews ended with something like “yeah, so, despite a few things that I personally wouldn’t recommend, this is the best place for auto electrical Bentleigh has ever seen. These guys get a solid 8-and-a-half out of ten. Peace out, machine bros.”
Good grief, I was such a massive dork.