Haunted Window Tinting

Urgh, I can’t believe Ron watched that stupid British horror movie about the haunted skyscraper. He’s terrible with horror movies, even if they are really old and really bad. Now he can’t walk past a skyscraper without screaming out in fear and running away. That’s a little bit of a problem, given we work in the Melbourne central business district. Apparently, he thinks the skyscrapers are alive, leaning down and whispering “Hello Governor” and other British phrases to him. It’s not every skyscraper, though. It is only the skyscrapers with commercial glass tinting. Around Melbourne, unfortunately, there are a lot of tinted skyscrapers, including the one we work at.

Ron hasn’t been to work in a week now, and it’s getting increasingly difficult to convince our boss not to fire him. I’ve tried to talk Ron into visiting a psychologist, but he’s too afraid that one of the skyscrapers will attack him on the way. Even though there are no skyscrapers anywhere near his local psychologist, he absolutely refuses. It’s infuriating. Maybe I should just stop covering for him, and if he gets fired that’s his problem. He should be able to get over his ridiculous fear of big buildings with tinted windows, and it’s his fault for watching that dumb movie in the first place. It’s not like he’s afraid of decorative window film in the Melbourne CBD or anything. Just tinted windows on skyscrapers. It’s not logical at all. Does that make it a phobia? Well, even if it is a phobia, it’s a stupid phobia. Ron just needs to get over it.

It’s like that time where I watched a movie about an evil balloon that tried to destroy the world, and I had a strange fear of balloons for a few days. Eventually, though, I just decided that I couldn’t live my life in fear of an inanimate object. I got over it. For some reason, I don’t think Ron has the courage to get over his own illogical fear. I guess he’ll just be afraid of tinted skyscrapers forever.